You should see what he wears while guarding me.
I need a bodyguard like I need an extra toe on my foot. But my Popoluca has been insistent since both family members and familiars began making unexpected obituary notices.
My bodyguard is almost as confused as I am. He thinks that I am his bodyguard, which may be true because he is my Popoluca's favorite son.
Anyway, the two of us have been seen driving a mysterious dark window tinted black SUV throughout the inaccessible areas of Los Tuxtlas, and the word on the street is that we are probably two gay drug lords visiting their plantations. The smart observors think we are buying up Los Tuxtlas at bargain prices and are now tripling their asking prices.
Catemaco is not far from the end of the universe in terms of accessibility. Nevertheless, the pueblo has a relatively violent history. Some of the lurid items are political candidates shooting each other in the thirties, and a multiple homicide brujo war in the 1990's.
Lately, the homicide rate in this village of 24,000 has been increasing beyond the usual machete shlashings of disrespectful friends or family.
Some serious assassinations involving kidnaps, drugs, drugs, and more drugs have been making statewide headlines along with the Catholic church supposedly booing the local brujos.
All that mayhem is gist for chit chat, and boy, oh boy, does Catemaco have chit chat. I seriously think that a loud fart on one end of Catemaco will be discussed on the other end within minutes.
Anyway, today's murder case, involving the chief brujo's son seems to have been converted into a simple kidnap with blood loss.
Nevertheless my Popoluca now wants to add another guard to my entourage.
Would someone know whether there are any used Pope Mobiles available?
