Dead in Catemaco

My popoluca's father recently died.
12 hours later he was buried and gone.

If you are sick in Catemaco, Veracruz or any other provincial burg in Mexico, and you can afford it, you usually will not die in your town but somewhere else where supposedly the medical service is better. The hifaluting Mexican medical system and service has yet to filter down to cosmopolitan areas of less than a million.

Catemaco's neighbor has what is called a second level hospital. I don't really know what that means, but I do know that any local worth his money avoids it and seeks refuge in neighboring major towns or even Mexico City, all much more than 3 hours away. There,supposedly,  are first level hospitals which  have all the facilities you would expect from a mickeymouse community hospital in gringolandia.

My popoluca's father recently died in a Coatzacoalcos first rank hospital during the middle of the night. He  left 15 known offspring, a reputation for being a brujo, a hunter and a damn good boat builder.


4 hours later he arrived in Catemaco. 8 hours later he was under ground . There are no facilities, need or desire to embalm. Local burial is always speeded up to prevent dead body odor.

Athough that speed seems callous, Catemaco compensates mourning by extending it a minimum of nine days when the family and friends sit around, pray, eat funeral food and block city streets. 40 days later the whole process is repeated.

Very basic cost  for a funeral is a very rock bottom minimum of 5000 pesos, but usually costs are a lot more astronomical for low income earners intent on impressing their fellow greavers. (Caskets are still not being sold by Walmart, though they should).

Cremation is available many miles away, but the length of time of bureaucratic licensing of moving a corpse raises a lot of stink without embalming.

SO - please don't die in beautiful downtown Catemaco!

!Viva el Quetzal!

OOPS  that was supposed to go to Catemaco Noticias!
Basically what it says it that the quetzal, one of the world's most beautiful birds, treasured by ancient Mexican cultures as worth more than gold, has now been bred in captivity.


Una buena noticias para iniciar el año nuevo con esperanza..
(Good news to start the new year with hope)

"Tuxtla Gutiérrez.- El Zoológico ... localizado al sur de la capital de Chiapas, consiguió que dos polluelos de quetzal nacidos en sus instalaciones rebasaran el primer año de vida, un logro que no ha alcanzado ningún otro zoológico del mundo.

Aunque desde el año 2002 el Zoomat ha registrado el nacimiento de ocho polluelos de quetzal (Pharomachrus Mocinno), las crías difícilmente habían sobrevivido más de una semana, pues se trata de un ave sumamente delicada a los cambios de alimento y ambiente.

El ave sagrada de los mayas, toltecas y mexicas, cuyo plumaje verde metálico valía más que el oro, está en peligro de extinción por la cacería furtiva y la destrucción de su hábitat, que es el bosque de niebla, donde llueve 200 días al año. "

Fuente: Milenio, Foto: Sigmatec

Catemaco to the Yucatan

With haunts of the "south will rise again" southern Veracruz sugar cane farmers have successfully cut the only roads leading from the rest of Mexico to the Yucatan. After first blocking the bridge leading from Catemaco south to Acayucan/Villahermosa, they have now also blocked the cuoata (toll road) south of Acayucan.

This is a political gambit involving the payment of price supports to sugar mills. It is also a pain in the butt for anyone traveling these highways. Usually these common blockages last only a few hours, until the Veracruz governor sends in some sugar coated promises.

We recently round tripped the Yucatan from Catemaco to Villahermosa, Campeche, Merida, Tulum and Chetumal/Belize. Once you get the hell out of Veracruz, the roads are surprisingly good, only marred by long stretches of new road construction. Highways are very well marked and frequently give you a choice of different mileages to the next city. Speed controls are almost non existant and we often puffed along at 100 miles per hour.

Once out of the majorcities, you need to be a mind reader to know which turn to take. We proudly got lost trying to find Celestun, leaving Merida, short cutting from Chichen Itza and entering Tulum from the inland side. The worst nightmare was trying to leave downtown Chetumal.

All in all, we had a wonderful trip and the only pertinent advise is to NEVER ask a Mexican pedestrian for directions. Their usual sense of courtesy does not allow admitting they don´t know and instead they will fabricate some twists and turns to keep you happy. This is especially true in rural areas where the concept of roads is frequently presumed to include horse trails.

My Popoluca taught me the most pertinent trick. Hire a taxi to lead you where you are going! It works.
Photo: "My historic ruins" of Uxmal

Catemaco Crime Wave

Naturally someone had to upset my enjoyment of the Christmas shenanigans in beautiful downtown Catemaco. A good friend who had left the so called "war zone" of Oaxaca for the peaceful environs of Laguna Catemaco called desperately wanting to borrow my machine pistol for the next few days.

Apparently he is being victimized by an extorsion phone call demanding the magnificent sum of 15,000 pesos or they'd kill his family. Naturally I rushed my phone recorder, caller ID equipment and a bottle of Johnnie Walker Green Label to his rescue. My gun, unfortunately was glued to my fingers, so I had to call another friend to share his arsenal with this poor under gunned soul.

I've been somewhat following the frequency of phone extorsions in Mexico, so it was no surprise to me that the local police commander calmly stated something like "Oh, yeah, we have reports of 6 of these calls today, with 4 from your colonia (neighborhood)". As an afterthought the corrupt greedy SOB mentioned he would be willing to negotiate a settlement.

After hearing that, I thought to myself that the recent report of 110,000 of these type of calls in Mexico City this year, were probably a Florida undercount.

There are unfortunately no statistics of how many victims actually paid, or whether anyone, anywhere was hurt because of one of these calls.

Nevertheless, it is a frightening experience to receive one of these extorsion calls, and that is why I was so willing to share the local rarity of my green Johnnie Walker, but not my gun.

Catemaco Monster

"early in 1969 the good citizens residing around Lake Catemaco in Mexico began to see their pet monster again"

Apparently John A. Keel in his book "The Complete Guide to Mysterious Beings"  mentions a huge black serpent with two heads being sighted in the laguna.

Does anyone have the complete description?

Merry xmas , y'all

Photo: pagetutor.com